• week 1 of friendship: this is a cool person
  • week 30 of friendship: this is a gay egg

mahimahi713:

cannibals-insomnia:

I’m putting my cat on a vegan diet.

"how could you do that! that’s animal abuse"

No it’s not. a vegan-only diet is actually very healthy for them.

"cats are carnivores. they need to eat meat"

I know. that’s why it’s a vegan-only diet. I feed them only the finest vegans I can find.

I was about to go off on you

(via hipsterizzy)

"What if women had minstrel cycles instead of menstrual cycles? You’d just have a guy with a lute follow you around for a week every month and play you songs constantly?"

My boyfriend (via thecarrionlibrarian)

#no but can you imagine if that was how you learned once a month you weren’t pregnant#by some dude singing songs about the victory of it#you wake up and he’s there and you are so happy#this dude becomes your favorite dude#but then you realize you haven’t seen your friend’s minstrel in a while#I mean everyone notices#like half the people are on the same cycle so for one week out of four your job is just flooded with fucking minstrels everywhere#the cacophony#but Mary over there is all alone#and she’s like my minstrel is late#but we all fucking know#her minstrel has gone off to find her a baby#a nine month journey he must make alone#and until he comes back there is no music in her life#what a glorious world this would be#I love the minstrels (@onionjuggler)

(via flamingstairway)

baeddeldeer:

Why do ppl get so mad when girls like themselves

(Source: deerdyke, via abitofwhatyoufancy)

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